THE MIKES WAY, OR THE HIGHWAY *Literally*
Mike here, if you dont like our prices, then I know what to tell you. Hop back on that express way and head 275 miles west and tell our closest competition that mike sent you. I guarantee they will not help you. Fartin Carls prices are expensive and the work they do takes 3 extra days and an arm and a leg to fund it. Not to mention their signature coconut fragrance smells will give you a nasty headache. Once you see their prices, you'll be pulling back into our lot with your car on fumes, not only asking for gas, but pleading for our service.
| Packages | Description | Price |
|---|---|---|
| The Ole Little Bump Remover | Our professionals on duty will assess the damage, pull out the dent like a dentist, and send you on your way. | $55.00 - $100.04 |
| The Oopsie Daisy | This package is a step up from "The Ole Little Bump Remover", the paint is damaged and needs a little touch up along with a dent that is tougher than nails and cannot simply be pulled out. | $250.05 - $600.26 |
| The Im in Deep Manure (Walk-ins) | No questions asked, the damages explain themselves. Buckle up and let us go CRAZY. Disclaimer, due to this being a walk in, we will not buff the car after paint. Courtesy of CRAZY MIKE. | $800.00 - $1,200.02 |
| WHAM BAM, THANK YOU VAN (Appointments Only) | This is our top of the line care package. We will sand down any damages, pull out the dents, use our body filler method, smooth everything off, paint, and finally buff out anything left. We will also leave our signature Cherry scent fragrance in the car. | $1,500.00 - $3,125.25 |
| Names of packages are fictional, prices are made up, nothing is being sold here, nor is there any validity to these deals. | ||
Payment will be accepted by our front desk secretary, Carla. Be warned, she may seem sweet, but if payment is not provided, or if payment doesnt go through, you'll meet a real life gremlin in broad daylight. We accept, cash, card, checks (there will be a slight processing fee, and a fine if checks bounce), or bottle return slips from our local grocery store. All other negotiations will be declined. (Im talking about you David, sweeping the front lot does not cover payment. Even if you do a great job.) Failure to pay will resort in a civilian arrest via an RKO and law enforcement will be called from the next county over.